18 Comments

Have just read it. Excellent. It speaks of all the nuances that I was also exploring. Thank you!

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Thank you for this wonderful share Thomas!!

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Identity is like my postal code. It helps get the mail to me, it just isn't who I am. I am not an object, some thought floating across consciousness. When I look inward to see who or what is experiencing all this, there is an encounter with awareness. Breathing in, I am aware of the feeling of being, without attributes. Staying in not knowing, I see through the silent, eyes of eternity. My heart breaks open.

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Love this Thomas!

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Glad you liked it. In my view, the trap of identity which James Baldwin mentioned in the Guardian article, is that we unconsciously objectify ourselves when we believe that our self-concept is who we are. The direct experience is a whole 'nuther kettle of fish.

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Yes, I definitely see a trap in defining myself as one thing, and in doing so, creating a division between me and identities outside of this one particular identity. Not to mention, I find it very limiting. We are such complex human beings and I truly believe that if we take genuine curiosity in each other’s stories, we will find many things in common. Or at least, a compassion for our failings. And you know what is interesting… some of the people closest to me, who I am honoured to call a “soul brother” and “soul sister” are not the same race as me and yet we complete each other’s sentences! This is part of the human experience. Thank you for sharing this with me Thomas. Baldwin is one of my favourite writers.

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As you say, humans are extremely complex. Our definitions always fall short. I could not possibly reduce you or anyone else to a thought in my head. Even without any stories, identities, or beliefs, what looks out through these eyes recognizes what is looking out through your eyes.

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Incredibly relatable piece. I wrote on similar themes of rejecting labels recently. Thank you. There are so many ways to identify myself, and I hate being forced into more boxes.

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So relieved to hear I’m not alone! Share your piece with me?

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https://tiffanychu.substack.com/p/roots-and-wings-taiwanese-american-identity-belo

It's paid, but you should be able to unlock as a teaser post?

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Such a thoughtful and relatable piece, with at its core, much of what has sowed division and partisanship among us. Love reading you!

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Köszönöm!! :) I know what you mean, but it’s a shame that we cannot have a respectful, critical conversation on such topics. A friend sent me a private message today after reading this essay saying that it was “radical” (in a good way, but not to be acknowledged in public). I reread it in a bit of a panic, but I didn’t find anything radical in it. It’s just how my common sense works. I know you get me :)

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I think we have different levels of self-identity. There's who I am in my core. There's who I am in relation to others. There's who i am in relation to the universe. There's who I am at the different stages of my life. In my core, I am me. In relation to others, i am my children's mom, my husband's wife, a writer, an artist, a neighbor, a teacher.... In the universe, I am a speck, but also connected to every other sub-atomic particle. (But, mostly, I am my kids' mom!) When it comes to writing, i think everyone should write whatever they want, always. Appropriate away! Just understand that if the writing is not good, it may not ever see the light of day.

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Oh Mary, I can totally identify with what you’re saying! :)) Especially being my kids’ mum… I also agree with you on the writing part. To write a German character that didn’t sound ridiculous, I consulted my German friend and did so much research! Mainly because I didn’t want it to be bad writing!

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I really appreciate your thoughtful exploration of this complex topic. Given your life experiences, it makes so much sense to me that you "won't identify as one thing" and resist labels. My life has been so different; I'm monolingual and have lived in the same region of the US for all of it, one where the majority of people look like me. Because of my lack of wider experience, I am very hesitant to write about places and people outside of most of my identities. I can see how the questions of identity and appropriation are very different for you than for me; you have kinds of authority that I don't. I wish all our conversations about these things contained more of the nuance you provide here!

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Thank you Rita!! I know it’s a controversial topic but it needn’t be, if it is approached with an open mind and respect. I love to explore the grey zone in every question because I find it is the most interesting. Yes to nuance. Always.

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A little window into your being. 💗

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